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Chapter 37. Roe is Sad
Back to: Chapter 36. The Glade Next: Chapter 38. Eskil is worried.

The even breaths told Roe that her mother and father had been sleeping for hours but every time she closed her eyes to try to sleep troublesome thoughts whirled around in her head. She felt sorry for her parents to have such a terrible daughter. Her father had been right; an elf could of course never love a mortal. She didn’t believe that her father had known that such a love would kill the elf but he had been right none the less. If she had listened to her parents everything would be fine now, but instead she had been selfish and now Aliendre would die because of it. Maybe there was still a chance that Thorundur could save Aliendre and that he and the elven princess could be happy together. There was no point in trying to sleep so she sneaked out of the hut and sat down under the clear sky.


Her fantasies had been so childish and selfish. She had believed that she could somehow just borrow Thorundur while she lived. When she died he would continue his everlasting life with the elves. Now she knew that it wasn’t possible. She tried to imagine what it must be like to be immortal and not have to think about the years that passed. Immortality must be the greatest gift that had ever been given to any living creature in the world and if it had been her gift she couldn’t imagine that she would ever want to give it up.

Roe promised herself that from now on she would be a very good daughter and do everything that her parents told her. She would take Bear as a spouse and live a normal life like she was supposed to. After all, any girl would consider herself very lucky to live with Bear. She had been very ungrateful to not appreciate her parents’ care. Of course she wanted to have a family and she was not getting any younger. If she waited too long Bear might chose another girl and she would probably never find a spouse at all. It was time to grow up.


When she thought about the children that she would have she felt some happiness but she couldn’t conjure a feeling of happiness when she thought about the rest of her future. Obviously there was something very wrong with her. Her parents always patiently corrected her and explained things that they seemed to take for granted. She always did things that worried and surprised them. The life that others of her people lived seemed so suffocating and limited but she would do her best to be like them. After all she was a child of the forest and she should be grateful for everything that the forest gave to her people. She would have to give up being Thorundur’s friend although it was almost unbearable to imagine a life without him. It would be even harder to try to live like the Forest people as Bear’s wife if she would continue to meet the person that understood her better than anyone, the person that made her heart beat faster and the colors become brighter.

“Roe, why are you sitting here? The elf needs you. You must go and find him.”


Roe flinched. The voice sounded distant and familiar. She looked up. In front of her was The Mother!


Horrified Roe fell to the ground. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know. I never wanted Aliendre to die. Please forgive me.”

“ Roe, I am not angry at you. How could I be when I love you so much? You must find the elf before it is too late.” The Mother’s voice was gentle.


“Too late for what? He doesn’t want me, he hates me and I don’t blame him because I’m a terrible person. But I will try very hard to improve. Please forgive me. I will honor my father and my mother and I will always listen to them from now on.”

The Mother put a finger over her lips and smiled a gentle smile. “Hush Roe, where is my brave girl tonight? This is not like her. The elf does not hate you and he needs you more than ever. I know you can find him if you try but I’m afraid that it might be too late. Remember that my love will always be with you no matter what happens.” The Mother started to walk away from Roe and soon she was absorbed into the night like she never had been there, just like the last time Roe had met her.


Did Thorundur really need her? Then he must be in trouble. Roe felt the panic rising in her. Was it not enough that she would be the cause of Aliendre’s death? Had something bad happened to Thorundur too? She would do her best to find him and save him if he needed to be saved. Then she would not cause any more troubles. She would move to Bear and be a good spouse and raise children of the Forest people and she would never see Thorundur again. It couldn’t be too late, it just couldn’t. She looked up at the sky. It was clear enough so the moonlight should be sufficient to track Thorundur.


She strapped a hunting knife around her thigh, rolled some things that might prove to be useful in a skin, and went out into the night.

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